oh . . . and you know, love too. ;)
Are you ready for it? I now bring to you the 2007 edition of Aziner's Bogus Valentine's Statistics, sponsored by humor and presented without bitterness interruption.
99% of girls tell their closest friends everything
only 30% of guys ever use this to their advantage (a girl's closest chicas know everything you need to know & are generally willing to help you b/c it's most important to them that you make their friend happy)
78% of girls who date jerks do so because it's much less disappointing to be hurt by them than the "good" guys
64% of guys really do mean well, they just don't understand women
36% are just genuine dillholes
42% of women would marry for wealth over love
81% of single women buy Valentine's chocolates for themselves, 92% of which is purchased the day after Valentine's in order to enjoy the clearance prices - no sense in being single AND poor
54% of single guys never even realize it's Valentine's day
fine dining restaurants tend to raise their prices by 10-20% over their norm on Valentine's day
33% of women would prefer a quiet, candlelit dinner at home
17% of women, as long as they are with someone who cares about them, would be happy just ordering pizza on Valentine's Day
48% of girls who honestly don't care that much about Valentine's Day would still be really happy to be surprised with flowers (of course this goes for any random day of the week & random days are actually even better)
52% of girls are crazy about Valentine's day and will be furious if the guy in their life doesn't buy them the perfect present, which they expect to get without ever telling the guy or giving any sort of hints
100% of guys are not mind readers
99% of guys don't pick up on subtle hints
98% of guys don't pick up of flashing neon lights kinds of hints
97% of guys will buy the correct present if the girl says hey, this would be such a great gift
84% of women wish they could find a guy who could read their mind
92% of these women can't even read their own minds half the time
99% of sane women realize that getting the "perfect" gift on Valentine's day does not determine how much their guy loves them, it's the normal day to day stuff that does
only .25% of women are sane (sorry guys, you're screwed) ;)
27% of women make an effort to be marginally sane
73% of women just embrace the crazy
81% of guys will put up with it because they truly believe all women are crazy
19% of guys hold out for the marginally sane
Valentine's day is a 4 billion dollar a year industry, flowers make up for 2/3rds of that
100% of authors of this blog now considering a career as a florist
100% of you have enjoyed this year's installment of bogus statistics or at least I hope
Happy Valentine's Day all! Happy Hump Day as well!**
*Not a joke, this website told me so.
**Valentine's Day and Hump Day shall not become combined activities for any non-married persons. oh wait I meant, don't take it like that ;)
Are you ready for it? I now bring to you the 2007 edition of Aziner's Bogus Valentine's Statistics, sponsored by humor and presented without bitterness interruption.
99% of girls tell their closest friends everything
only 30% of guys ever use this to their advantage (a girl's closest chicas know everything you need to know & are generally willing to help you b/c it's most important to them that you make their friend happy)
78% of girls who date jerks do so because it's much less disappointing to be hurt by them than the "good" guys
64% of guys really do mean well, they just don't understand women
36% are just genuine dillholes
42% of women would marry for wealth over love
81% of single women buy Valentine's chocolates for themselves, 92% of which is purchased the day after Valentine's in order to enjoy the clearance prices - no sense in being single AND poor
54% of single guys never even realize it's Valentine's day
fine dining restaurants tend to raise their prices by 10-20% over their norm on Valentine's day
33% of women would prefer a quiet, candlelit dinner at home
17% of women, as long as they are with someone who cares about them, would be happy just ordering pizza on Valentine's Day
48% of girls who honestly don't care that much about Valentine's Day would still be really happy to be surprised with flowers (of course this goes for any random day of the week & random days are actually even better)
52% of girls are crazy about Valentine's day and will be furious if the guy in their life doesn't buy them the perfect present, which they expect to get without ever telling the guy or giving any sort of hints
100% of guys are not mind readers
99% of guys don't pick up on subtle hints
98% of guys don't pick up of flashing neon lights kinds of hints
97% of guys will buy the correct present if the girl says hey, this would be such a great gift
84% of women wish they could find a guy who could read their mind
92% of these women can't even read their own minds half the time
99% of sane women realize that getting the "perfect" gift on Valentine's day does not determine how much their guy loves them, it's the normal day to day stuff that does
only .25% of women are sane (sorry guys, you're screwed) ;)
27% of women make an effort to be marginally sane
73% of women just embrace the crazy
81% of guys will put up with it because they truly believe all women are crazy
19% of guys hold out for the marginally sane
Valentine's day is a 4 billion dollar a year industry, flowers make up for 2/3rds of that
100% of authors of this blog now considering a career as a florist
100% of you have enjoyed this year's installment of bogus statistics or at least I hope
Happy Valentine's Day all! Happy Hump Day as well!**
*Not a joke, this website told me so.
**Valentine's Day and Hump Day shall not become combined activities for any non-married persons. oh wait I meant, don't take it like that ;)
Comments
I can assure you that a high school is most definitley the most obnoxious place to spend Valentine's Day. I forgot what a big deal it is to the high school crowd. My classroom was filled with ladies (and guys) toting balloons, candy, and flowers.