reverie

(I'm the little one)

Repeat after me, largest democracy in the freakin' universe. Well, that's assuming they don't have democracies on Betazed, but I'm pretty sure they don't. Yep, busting out my Star Trek nerd-dom. Anyway, the place I was actually referring to is called India, you've probably heard of it, it's not from Star Trek. It is the largest democracy. It kicked England's arse out about 58 years ago. Not unlike us, only they did a better job of it. Given these similarities and the vast coolness of India, this is probably a country we should be really good friends with. But no, who did we just sell F-16s to? That'd be freakin' Pakistan, India's number one enemy, and a potentially volatile country harboring nukes. Props on that plan. Not that I don't think India and Pakistan should resolve things and that the U.S. can be friends with both countries, but all we're succeeding in doing right now is angering India & that's a craphole of a plan. N

I wanted to post something, but I do not feel like sharing what is going on in my life right now. Simply because I am on the verge of something great and I fear that the slightest whisper could knock it off its course and I do not wish for that to happen. It is silly, I know, but I promise to share more when things are more concrete. In the meantime I will offer you words from Phil. "but I feel lost in the void of being... what I mean is, I guess I forget myself in my surroundings- the people I meet and their stories, the world around me with its flowering trees and drifting-cloud skies, and the sun that plays tricks, hiding and then melting at the end of each day, shifting all the shadows behind it. Sometimes it's relieving to forget yourself. Thinking about where I am in the world, I can almost feel it's curve; I feel like a spot on the giant globe, standing still as it revolves, my blood moving to the subtle tides of it's magnetic fields, pulling me out onto the roa

somewhere over the rainbow he played on acoustic guitar laughter waves crashing on the shore eroding away grains of sadness replaced by chocolate covered memories and the promise of hope spring will arrive soon joy blissfully foolish optimism the haze is gone I can see beyond the immediate the pain is washing out to sea I can think of you again even in the distance and smile just because I know you So, I wrote that last night when I was in a really happy mood as I had a great time hanging out with my roomie and her friend. Today was less happy, but I still wanted to post this. The haze thing is literal, it was remarkably hazy here last week, but today I could see the mountains even. For those of you who don't know, you can live in Los Angeles for almost a year and not realize that you should be able to see mountains here. That sounds quite sad, I realize, and to some extent it is. But the marvelous thing is that you really truly appreciate their splendor on the days you can see the

to those who have been there when I've been so sad, who have stuck around and not tried to offer simple answers where there are none to those who have cared enough to make sure I'm okay or that I will be (I will, today was a better day) to those who come back here even when I have nothing amusing or whimsical to say, I greatly desire to make you laugh or at least smile, but sometimes I get caught up in the sorrow. I will do my best to have something funny to say soon to those of you who pray, it works, I have felt it and am eternally grateful to my friends who visit me, even though I hate to see you go (I had so much fun with you here, Shauna) to those who comment here, I like reading your thoughts to the Jewish man in the Easter candy aisle, ah what blissful irony- yes, I have considered the possibility that he was a Messianic Jew, but please don't ruin my amusement with your earth logic to the crazy people at the farmer's market who protest making ponies give rides to

now I lay me down to sleep I pray the Lord my soul to keep I can't keep it anymore I've locked myself outside hope's door guide me through this long, dark night if I last 'til dawn I might find my long lost faith again help me to hold on 'til then may the sun soon rise and wash away these cloudy skies hold me close until I wake this pain seems more than I can take

Since I can guarantee that I'm having a cooler week than you are, I offer you the amazing fantastical most spectacular supercalifragilisticexpealidocious don't care how that word is really spelled sex free kind of a hump day! Why is your week so cool, Azina? You might be wondering. And I would answer that it is because Shauna who is one of my favoritist people in the universe is in town right now. She arrived on Monday and on the way home from the airport we decided to meet Nicole for lunch in Santa Monica. On the way my lovely little car got a flat tire. Funny how seriously last week I thought to myself, "hmm I've never gotten a flat tire while driving before." Me and my stupid thoughts. Thankfully Shauna is awesome and can change a tire because I am completely worthless in that capacity. We then drove the few blocks to Panera for lunch, and discovered that the spare had gone flat. Good times. Then Panera didn't have the soup I wanted even though it was Monda

You ever have moments when you really feel like writing something, but when you actually sit down to do it you have nothing to say? And that's not to suggest that there is nothing to say. Most of you don't know that when our lease is up in April Heather will be moving into an apartment of her own with her new puppy. And Nicole and I will be moving into a new place. So there's apartment hunting happening on top of job searching. Life is a little scary right now with its complete lack of stability. Tuesday night Nicole and I made a nice dinner and had some wine to toast our apartment searching. We had chicken & pasta with a white wine sauce. Yeah, the alcohol didn't really get cooked out of the sauce enough. Whoops. It was yummy though and as Nicole put it, "Who doesn't like getting drunk off of pasta?" Wow, I just realized that this new apartment will be the 8th place I move into in 5 years. Bleh. It'll be really nice for the transient lifestyle to