From time to time I like to peruse some of the articles MSN offers on the subject of relationships to see what kind of crazy, ridiculous advice they're peddling of late (like proposing via a billboard, a very bad idea). Much to my surprise & delight they had a good bit of advice on where to take a girl on a first date:

• The zoo. Sure, it’s childish, but childish sometimes works. And meandering among primates provides a nice contrast to your own charms. It says, “Compared to these monkeys, I don’t throw feces.”

Now some of you may be thinking, of course you think that's a good date, you've been saying that forever. And you would be right, I can't disagree when someone else stumbles upon the good sense that I've had for many a year. Nevertheless they get props for not offering a terrible suggestion and for presenting it in a humorous manner. Plus if you actually use the feces quote it will be a good gauge of the girl's appreciation and/or tolerance of poop related conversation/jokes. Probably something most guys ought to figure out early on. ;)

Bonus points: take her on a picnic at the zoo.